we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
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