I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
