problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize