escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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