Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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