porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
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