Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Randomize
