You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
