There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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