just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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