Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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