I wanna bring you to show and tell
literally had 100 drinks last night.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
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