Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize