I should be sponsored by Trojan
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize