If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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