I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
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