I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize