i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Ambien. No doubt about it.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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