I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
