I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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