You can't motorboat a personality
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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