is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
