arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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