You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
All the doctor said was why
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
