so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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