so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
My life is pants optional.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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