I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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