ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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