I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
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