They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
