So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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