hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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