Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
