Only a mothe r could love this liver
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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