I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
