I'm so fucking centered right now
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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