i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
