If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
