I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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