Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
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