think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
