but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Randomize