We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
