I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
