I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
