I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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