I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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