The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Randomize
