no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize