when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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