Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
